How Can I Be Sure God Loves Me?

I was asked to come out to a friend's church tonight. So I said why not...I got the car and I haven't seen him in a while. I wanted to get out and just do something, and church sounded pretty nice.

When I get there I was asked to sing. Thank God I was on point with my harmonies. i had to focus really hard, but it is getting easier and easier. That is one thing. He asked me to sing a solo before the service was suppose to start so I sang a three song medley.

It was really nice if I do say so myself. :-)

I sang Yes Jesus Loves Me, Even Me, and Precious Lord. I also sang Pass Me Not and Great Is Thy Faithfulness with some of the praise team. It was really an awesome night. Haven't spoken in tounges that hard in a long time...I even got me my shout on. It was a lot of fun.

After everything was done people were on a spiritual high. One of the kids came to me, and said that I really blessed them with my testimony song...(the medley I did). I said thank you. I could tell something was going on...this young man wanted to ask me something. I was ready to leave, but I asked is there something more. He said how can I know if God really loves me. I'm different.

I smiled and said we are all different. We are all unique. He smiled, but I knew he needed more. So I told him why I know for a fact without a shadow of a doubt that Jesus loves you. He said that doesn't God love more people than others...the ones that are more like the church heads. I laughed. I said Jesus is here for all the outcast. He came for those that felt they had no home or they had to try to be something else.

I knew that he needed a word, and I said why not. At this point there was a crowd of people forming around me. I started to feel uncomfortable, and asked God for strength and speak through me.

I said who here at times feels like an outcast. You feel that you have to hide, be shameful, you don't fit in, you are just not sure all the time. So many of the raised their hands. It was so sad to see. I told them Jesus came for those like you. God chose to save the outcast through an outcast.

Jesus was born an illegitimate baby, born to an unwed teenage mother. He was born poor and in a barn, around animals and piss and feces. He was adopted by his earthly father, and immediately knew what it was like to be an illegal alien. He was chased and hunted...talk about being an outcast, and having all the chips against you from birth.

Jesus was born in Egypt...he was a person of color on the run. A Jew of color. Jesus never married...he was a unmarried man where a man should be married so he was a huge outcast. It didn't help that he brought his mother along with him to his first miracle which was a gathering of all men where he changed water into wine.

Jesus had some very weird disciples. None of them were religious. All the religious people to day that are all about ceremony, and protocol today would call Jesus a fool and a hippie. :-)

All of them were scary people...he hung out with Publicans and sinners. In the Book of John, it speaks about said disciple that after they ate this disciple had a habit of laying his head on Jesus chest. Jesus was that close and intimate with his people...he is God. Yet the men of the church saw these people as less worthy, and questioned how can the "Son of God" do such things.

This man would lay there as Jesus taught and looked up into his eyes. This isn't a gay thing, but an intimacy thing where the Son of God was that close to his disciples...people that the church turns away, talks about, and is quick to judge...outcast.

Jesus made the religious right in his day so mad. Jesus came against the religious the hardest. He came against those that wore the robes, and were so into the rituals. He came across those that felt they had the way.

These religious figures said to Jesus that you eat food that is impure. Jesus said it is not what goes into your mouth, but what comes out that defiles one. They said you don't keep to the traditions of your elders/church...he said for the sake of our traditions you render useless and powerless the Word of God.

They said you don't obey God...he said you honor God with your lips, but your hearts are far from him.  The church was meant to be a house of prayer for the outcast, but it was turned into a money making enterprise. Jesus told these people to leave the church and open it up for the outcast.

When Jesus went to heal the leper, he was doing it against all the advice of the religious leaders. Lepers in that day had to ring a bell and say unclean unclean. No one could go near them, no could touch them...they were filth. Here comes my main man Jesus. His disciples tell him don't touch him, the leper is saying don't touch me, and the church is saying if you touch him you are out.

What does Jesus do? He walks right up to the leper and hugs him and says outcast be clean...God loves you. The leper raises his hands to heaven, healed, and says he gets it. That leper was touched for the first time in a long time, and that man would never be the same again.

In those days the worst kind of outcast in those days were women. Especially during the time of their menstruation...they were considered unclean. Anything they touched including a pot and pan had to be taken to the temple and be cleansed. A woman wants to be healed and she can't get by all the religious BS that is holding her back.

So she sneaks by them and says if I can just touch the hem of his garment then I will be healed. She makes it and touches him. At that moment Jesus turns arounds and asks who touched me. She had to be scared feeling her life was over, but what did Jesus do. He raises her up and calls all the men's attention and says to them I have not seen faith like this in all of Isreal. Jesus turns to her and says be well.

Can you believe that?!?! Jesus put this woman, an outcast and unclean thing ahead of the men. You know he wasn't winning any points. :-)

The Samaritan women who has had 5 divorces, outcast. She is the only person in the person in New Testament literature that he trust with his secret. He told her an outcast that he is the Messiah. SAY WERD!!!!! :-D

They laughed at this. I was like can you believe Jesus telling his secret to someone that the church would look at funny when and if she was in church. Tell me God ain't good.

I mean this woman was an women...outcast. She wasn't married...outcast. Sleeping with many men...outcast. He sat on a well and talked and talked with her. His disciples come by asking him what is he doing...they must have been confused as you don't know what. They asked what the hell are you doing with that woman. I had to remind them that Jesus hung out with "sinners" so they probably used more loose language than that.

Some were shocked, but they shook their head, and a lot of people laughed. Some of the older people weren't too pleased, but I wasn't speaking for them...I was speaking to the children. I said that Jesus told his disciples that he was having a "theological" conversation, and either join in or go away. How awesome is that?!?!

I also told them one of my favorite scriptures. A young centurion from Rome is an outcast in Isreal because he is an occupying force. He is a militant oppression so to speak. If you read the literature of Rome you will see that most of these solidiers were gay men, and they normally traveled with their partners. At this point all eyes were on me, and some of the elders were getting antsy.

The youth were just looking confused, some scared, some anticipating, and others just had a look of tell me more. :-)

The KJV said that the centurion has a "servant" with him that is sick. The centurion cannot get to Jesus because that is the rules. What he does is shout across the crowd asking Jesus to heal his "servant." In the Greek the word for servant is not what is in the scripture. In the ancient Greek servant is dulos (if anyone knows how to really spell it in English please tell me).

In the bible the word actually used is "pais." Pais loosely translated means my special friend or beloved. The centurion says he is home sick in our bed. Jesus said I will come and heal your beloved. But the centurion just tells Jesus that he believes if he says it his beloved will be healed. Jesus agrees and said be healed...and the "servant" was healed and the centurion was reunited with his "servant."

Of course everyone was shocked, and so many people were crying, and tounges, and just happy. Of course some of the older saints weren't too pleased, but my reasoning was sound, and they were held back cause I know they wanted to say something. SMH. I hate the fact the only truth that can be spoken is one that is pre-approved.

I ended it by saying that Jesus is God's work in the world. He is here for all those that feel like an outcast. He is here for everyone that the church is quick to turn away, and talk about. Jesus is here for all of us despite our race, color, creed, and sexuality...Jesus is here for those that feel out of place in the religious sense. He is here for personal relationship.

I told them that for all those that feel you have to be ashamed, and you cannot be who you really are, understand that Jesus says you don't have to be that way. He ask you accept him, be baptized in water and spirit, and to go out and spread his message. When did we need a church for that?? Not that churches are wrong. By this time the pastors were telling us it is getting late and it is time to stop for now.

Some said that how can I say these things. I told them, and it was all based on actual facts...if they want to they go searching, and I even told them where to look and talk to for unbiased information. 

I asked everyone what type of event is this, and where did everyone come from? I got Baptist, COGIC, Church of God, PAW, UHC, COOLJC, UPCI, and more denoms at this event. By the time I was finish there were easily over 100 people there from all ages. I think I did a great job. Now to bed...I am so tired.

I have never been a person that was for religion, but I am always down for relationship. Seems Jesus was too...too bad so many people are tied to church, and feel like they need it to be closer to Jesus. 

Of course at this moment Tim is calling me, so lemme go be the mentor and big brother he needs. Everyone have a blessed day or night...whenever you maybe reading this.

Some of you ask me about Van. I don't know, but as soon as I hear about him I will let you guys know, and also my decision on the Kelly Temple situation. Is it weird I wanna tell him about tonight. He always felt I was going to be a preacher. Oh well.

J-Bo

P.S. I was asked about what about tattoos and things like that. I said God don't care about your tattoos, if your gay, straight, or whatever. He cares about you having a personal relationship with him. He doesn't care if you are a man or woman. If he did then all the women with jobs would be wrong, and slavery is right, and all science and technology and medicine advances are wrong, but they are not. I told them walk in knowing that you are who you are, and nothing is wrong with you.

P.P.S. Three kids came to me and asked me about being gay and chrisitian. They were so sad...so hurting. It breaks my heart. They said that my talk really helped them. I told them that it is ok. They asked me what they should do if they ever feel bad, and are told different. I said trust their hearts and read the stories on Jesus. I also said that there is no proof that the bible speaks against it, and even the scriptures on Paul talking about homosexuals was about Priest who were engaging in debauchery and prostitution and such. I told them Paul was writing to men and women that were not gay, but taking part in sexual practices not normal to them. Before they left I asked them what church they belong to...they told me COGIC and one was from COG. They are nice kids...told them to hit me up on fb.