God I need help!!!

Just wanted to let it be known that I love God with all my heart and all my soul.

As I sit here, I am just overwhelmed with emotion. I pray that God continues the work he is doing in my life.

It is a good feeling, but I feel like a piece of me is missing. I am asking all of you to have God fix that part of me...to fill that part of my spirit again with a love he blesses.

Everything is going well, and it looks like it is getting better, but I am looking for God to work in my life again, and bring a man into my life where we both fall head over heals for each other. Where we get lost in each other, and push each other.

Where we help each other grow and demand the best. Someone who challenges me, and forces me to grow. Someone who I can be an asset to. Someone that I can grow in all areas of my life with.

I want what I had with Van. It was so good, and so beautiful to love and be loved.

Something that very few people ever experience, and even less keep it. I ask that God give it to me again. I have so much love to give and experience...I want someone who at the very basic level is ok and happy with who they are, but want more.

I hope that you guys can pray this prayer with me...the truth is I don't want anyone else. Van and I worked well, but with the religious stuff it is a hurdle that I cannot do anything, but let God work.

I just got off with Dishone and he told me that he is done, cause him and Aaron are bumping heads, and this time the problem is with Aaron. That man is very stubborn, and so pig headed. I love him, but he needs to change, and as long as he feels he is perfect and nothing wrong with him he will be stuck.

Van and I didn't have that...we were always growing and changing, and doing and becoming more. I mean we had our fights, but we were learning each other so well.

I want that again...the only thing holding us back was that he refused to see and accept the truth about the bible and God. It seems it would take changing his entire COGIC faith for his to accept and open his heart to the truth.

What to do? What to do? What to do?

So God please send me someone to love, and someone who will love me back 110%. Honestly I ask that God send me the love I have had, but with growth and maturity, in knowing the true intentions of God.

Now to try and get some work done.

I wonder how Med School stuff is going with Van??

J-Bo