So I Ended Up Looking Like A Fool...Smh

I went to Barnes and Noble to just get out of the house and get some work done and enjoy myself.

But guess what happened when I'm sitting there reading a cool looking sci-fi book. I look up and I swear to you that I am not gong crazy, but I thought I saw Van.

I thought I saw him with a man and they were kissing. I got so damn hot and angry that I got up and ripped them apart. I was ready to kill that other guy and scream at Van. But they stopped kissing and I saw it wasn't him.

I was sweating, my heart was beating fast. I was actually angry, upset, and hurt.

I can't believe I would feel like that. Why do I even care? Why do I even think about this man?!?!

I immediately got up and drove home, and took a cold shower. Now I feel calm and more centered. I don't know what the hell that was about. I AM A ROCK!!!

I need to get another man and/or woman in my life and fast. One that is up to date on their health and sexual health stuff. I cannot have someone who doesn't care about their health.

I still can't believe that happened. I tell myself that I don't miss him, I don't still love him, that it is all a distant memory, and that he is no longer here. But then shit like this happens and God shows me up. I need to figure this out.

J-Bo