Going to BK to See My Sick Grandmother

So I am going to be in BK tomorrow...first I have to go to my school and kill some time and then heading there. I keep hearing that she did really well after the brain surgery. I want to see and touch her for myself.

I also wanna see the doctors that did such a great job with her. Medicine and Science have been really high up on my list as of late. I love that I have found that passion for more and more things.

My things to do tomorrow are go to school and print for no reason like crazy, see my grandmother, and grow these damn businesses.

IT IS SO HARD!!!!!

Growing one multi-million dollar company is hard, but many at the same time is damn near daunting. Not to mention I am actually planning on building many multi-billion dollar companies. I mean if I am going to go for something I might as well go for the stars!!

Also I had the craziest day yesterday. I mean it was cool and all. Not the most productive day I've had...and I've had many unproductive days as of late. For some reason I have all these fears and insecurities...so much and so many things. I just need to take that leap and GO!

Also yesterday was so hard. Everything I ate, saw, thought, watched, and did made me think of Van. It was the most annoying thing that has happened to me in a long time. :-)

I mean I was driving around looking at the area, and just clearing my head...he pops in. And it was crazy...like every song, everything was just bringing me back to him. He probably is engaged to some perfect polished church girl his family picked out for him.

I am still not worried about him and other women. Not in the slightest...if I was to hear he was married to a woman I wouldn't even blink. But what hurts is that I have been forgotten and thrown away. That I mean nothing.

Lemme get to bed...long day tomorrow.

I do wonder how medical school is going, and how everything with him is going...smh. That and I am so DAMN HORNY!!!!

I don't wanna sleep around because I don't wanna be that way just loose, and also HIV and STIs are at an all time high so no one gets a past...not w/o a blood test.

J-Bo